I had been extremely burnt out at work and it was really starting to show. I was not taking care of my mental or physical health. All I was doing was working. Since I was working from home, I would wake up, make a coffee and go straight to logging onto my computer. I wouldn’t even allow myself to enjoy my coffee or have any sort of a “morning routine.” There was no balance, it was work, work, work, work. There would be days when I wouldn’t even step foot outside. It was crazy. I had manifested my dream apartment, living exactly where I wanted to for years, and I would go multiple days without even stepping foot outside. Work took over my life, so much to the point that I felt as if I couldn’t step away from the computer for even just a few minutes. I would work all day until late at night and never give myself a break, not even the “15 minutes.” I’d just power through every day because there was so much that had to be done. Even during my so-called “lunches” I would sit at my kitchen table, eat, and reply to emails/slack messages on my phone. It never stopped. I’d go to bed thinking about all the to-dos for the next day and wake up to my mind racing. Replying to emails just minutes after I had first opened my eyes. I wasn’t even allowing myself to fully awaken before I’d start working for the day. In today’s society, work is so accessible to us. Before the pandemic, you would start work when you walked into the office, but working from home made it really easy to never disconnect. I was so unhappy with what had become. My true nature of being a free spirit, someone who was excited to see each day, someone who was grateful to just be alive was suddenly covered by a blanket of unhappiness, and feeling unfulfilled to the core. I had known exactly what I truly wanted to be doing and what I stood for as a person, and nothing aligned. I was so out of alignment with my true being.
This day in specific was really tough for me, and I was crying to my mom about it (which was rare). My mom suggested that I take the next day off because she could tell I was burnt out. It took a long time for her to convince me, but I finally realized she was right. This day I decided to have a total “me” day. Treat myself to all the things I loved, that made me feel like Yuka. I ended up at New Leaf in Downtown Santa Cruz and wanted to grab myself some lunch. I had never ordered a green juice from there before so I decided to try one out. After looking at the menu, I landed on “Best Coast,” got the drink, and went on with my day. Nothing really significant here…or so I thought.
My little brother and I were talking about angel numbers the night before. He told me that when he sees them on his phone, he likes to screenshot them – sort of like an affirmation. I was just walking around downtown when I pulled my phone out. It was 4:44 and I remembered what he said so I screenshotted it.
I came home and decided to warm up some homemade chipotle and make fresh guac. I had just got a new microwave a few days before so it was the first time I was using it. As I was warming up my food, I was listening to Pandora and an old 2005 alternative rock song was playing. I was singing the lyrics in my head, “I’m ready, I’m ready, I’m ready.” As I sang the word “ready” my microwaved beeped, I looked at it and the words “ready” appeared.
This was too much! Too many coincidences. Too many synchronicities. I had to tell my little brother what happened today. As I was texting him the pictures, I looked at the image I had taken of the guac on tv and thought to myself, “Damn I wish I could share this type of stuff on my social media” but at the time I thought it might be too esoteric and people might think I’m crazy. I imaged myself posting the picture of the guac on tv and wondered if anybody would have noticed the rubik’s cube on my soundbar and thought, “Ha, if they noticed that they would think it’s random/funny” and RIGHT after this thought, I looked up at the TV and the character said “Like you’re a sexy rubik’s cube” WHAT??? How? What are the odds of all of these “coincidences?” Impossible.
Synchronicities by definition, “phenomenon in which people interpret two separate—and seemingly unrelated—experiences as being meaningfully intertwined, even though there is no evidence that one led to the other or that the two events are linked in any other causal way.” How I like to interpret synchronicities are as winks from the universe, angels, or spirit guides to let us know that we are on the right path. Either what we’re thinking, doing, or feeling. When synchronicities happen, it’s always nice to give thanks to the universe for showing you that sign. I knew my spirit guides were trying to communicate to me on this day. I was taking care of myself that day. I did all the things that I knew would make me feel like myself again, at peace. Which is what the universe always wants for us, to simply be at peace. They were trying to remind me that they are here, watching, and protecting me. The message was loud and clear. They were preparing me for what was to come… 2 days later, we got hit with the news that my sister’s stage 4 Glioblastoma cancer came back. But this time, it was inoperable, she could not receive radiation, and had to be taken off chemotherapy because the tumor stopped responding to treatment. In that moment, I knew the only thing I could do was trust. Trust that everything will be okay, even though it seemed impossible.
Sometimes the signs will be clear as day and people will choose to ignore them. But the truth is, you are all divinely connected to your guides, angels, spirit. Pay attention and listen. We are all protected here. Signs and messages may come in different forms, but you will always hear what you are meant to be told.
And now looking back to this day, 7 months later, the message still is just as clear.
thanks for being here <3
yuka
p.s. – do not ever let a job be the reason why you aren’t taking care of yourself physically or mentally. You are the most important person in your life.